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Sympathy Meals 101

Thu, 17 Sep 2026 14:34:00 GMT

Sympathy Meals 101

Those who have faced a highly stressful time in their lives, such as major surgery, the birth of a baby, or a transition to a new home, know just how helpful and comforting it is to have someone else take care of the cooking. These meals, often referred to as sympathy meals, are also commonly associated with funerals. When someone you know experiences the death of a close loved one, providing home-cooked food is a great way to support them in their time of need. This small action can be a heartwarming blessing to those who are grieving. Here are a few things to consider before you start cooking.

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Communication

Let someone in the family know you will be bringing a meal and offer them a couple of dates to choose from. Because food intolerances and allergies are common, send a little menu that includes a few different options so they can select what they would prefer.

Quantity

Additional relatives or visitors might be present for the meal, so be sure to provide extra. If you are making a meal that is to be eaten at the time of delivery, you could double the recipe and make the second one freezer-friendly. This is a great way to provide more support later on when life might still feel a bit overwhelming for the family.

Presentation

You might want to consider how you personally would serve the dish and what else might be needed. Adding salad, dinner rolls, dessert, or even a beverage ensures that the family meal is completely taken care of. Use a disposable dish with baking instructions written on it. Throw in paper products, too, because the last thing they will feel like doing is washing dishes. Many people like to include a couple of inexpensive toys for children or a few basic grocery items such as fruit and eggs. These are added extras that might make life just a little bit easier for those dealing with a recent loss.

Delivery

Most likely, the best way to drop off your meal is to let them know when you plan to leave it at the door. However, depending on the person, you should also be prepared to stay and chat if they are wanting to spend time with a friend.

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Not a cook? Can’t squeeze in the time? Want to be different?

While a home-cooked meal might be most people’s first thought, there are other ways to provide a bit of cooking relief to those who are going through a difficult time. Including a gift card to a local restaurant that delivers or offers carryout is a great option, particularly if you suspect the family might already be receiving several casseroles in the next few days. There are also many online meal services that you can order from and have delivered to the family.

Preplanning Safely During COVID-19

Thu, 22 Oct 2020 04:00:00 GMT

Preplanning Safely During COVID-19

Preplanning your funeral brings you peace of mind knowing that your final wishes will be followed as you would want and that the financial aspects will be covered. Putting plans in place now means you get to make important choices for yourself, but it is also one of the greatest gifts you can give loved ones. Rather than feeling burdened at the time of death, they can focus on their journey through grief.

Our funeral home has a Preplanning Specialist on staff whose job it is to guide individuals and families through the preplanning process. Right now, we are faced with unique circumstances, but the current pandemic does not mean we have stopped providing the valuable service of helping people plan ahead. We have simply become more flexible and creative.

If you are interested in putting final arrangements in place, we are happy to do so in a way that meets you at your comfort level. We understand there are many individuals who would prefer to visit about preplanning in person, so we are currently still offering to meet at the funeral home while following social distancing and other Department of Health guidelines. We can also meet with you outdoors. For those who are interested in utilizing technology, we can conduct an entire prearrangement conference by phone and/or video conferencing. Forms can be signed electronically via email, or we can stop by your home to safely obtain the required signatures.

Call us at the funeral home if you have questions or if you would like to set up a preplanning meeting you are comfortable with. Keep an eye out for our upcoming preplanning seminars and events, which might be held online. For more information about preplanning, you can also visit our website.

Grief Journaling

Sun, 12 Jul 2020 04:00:00 GMT

Grief Journaling

If you have lost a loved one, writing in a journal can be one of the most powerful ways to cope and work toward healing. It encourages you to express and explore the myriad of emotions that accompany grief. Rather than avoiding the reality of the death and extending the grieving process, journaling encourages introspection, which is important in accepting loss and creating a sense of peace. You might not even realize what you are feeling until you sit down to write about it.

There are many mental health benefits of journaling , including reducing stress and coping with anxiety or depression. Journaling provides a healthy outlet when emotions feel overwhelming, which can be common while grieving. Practicing gratitude also helps you focus on the positives in life, so writing about what you are grateful for can provide perspective when times might feel shadowed by your grief.

One of the best parts about journaling is that there is no right or wrong way to do it, and you never even have to let anyone see your work. Sometimes the words will flow out of you without much thought and other times you might feel a bit stuck. Below is a list of grief journaling prompts you can use for inspiration whenever you need it.

• Make a list of your favorite things you did with your loved one. Make another list of what you wish you would’ve done.

• Explain how you are honoring the memory of your loved one in your daily life.

• Tell about the people you have in your support system.

• Pick a color that represents how you are feeling today and explain why.

• Write about the memories of your loved one that seem to be most heavy on your mind.

• Make a list of what you are grateful for today.

• Retell the last moments you remember being with your loved one.

• Write a letter to your loved one about what you have been doing to stay busy lately.

• Answer these questions to consider how your grief is impacting your activities:

· What is the hardest time of day for you and why?

· What is the hardest day of the week for you and why?

· During which daily activities do you find yourself in the densest fog of grief?

· During which daily activities do you find your mind wandering away from your grief?

· What has been your hardest day so far?

Ways to Offer Sympathy During COVID-19

Mon, 20 Apr 2020 04:00:00 GMT

Ways to Offer Sympathy During COVID-19

Having a service or gathering to remember and honor a life lived is an extremely vital part of the grieving process. It is a chance for loved ones to say goodbye, and it also provides an opportunity for friends, family, coworkers, and community members to offer necessary comfort and reassurance. However, there are currently restrictions on gatherings, and society is encouraged to stay home as much as possible because of the COVID-19 pandemic. As a result, you might need to get a bit more creative in order to express sympathy and offer support to those grieving.

This period of uncertainty might also be particularly trying for those who have lost a loved one in the past. If their loved one’s birthday or anniversary of death falls during this time, it might feel additionally lonely and sad due to social distancing and the already overwhelming current conditions. Many of the ideas listed below can be used to show you are thinking of these individuals who are facing difficult days as well.

Get Creative with Communication

Sending a sympathy card in the mail is currently still a viable option, but there are also many ways to use technology to let the family know you are sorry for their loss and thinking of them even though you cannot be there in person. Send a heartfelt text or set up a time to video conference. When it comes to social media, follow the lead of the family; if they have posted about their loved one’s death already, then it is appropriate to comment with your condolences.

There are a couple of ways to offer your sympathies and connect through our funeral home website. As always, you can view tribute videos and use our condolences page to leave a message for the family. In addition, we have created HeartStrings , an option for you to upload a photo and add a note to the family that will be printed and posted in an area for them to see and/or placed in a guest book. You can also view a live stream or recording of the service when available. Specific details regarding these options can be found on the individual’s obituary page.

For the message itself, simply expressing your sympathy will be appreciated by the family. But if you knew the deceased individual well, taking the time to share photos and memories is more personal and might help provide the family with a deeper sense of comfort right now. Think of it like giving a virtual hug.

Have Flowers or a Meal Delivered

Depending on what is available at the time, you might still be able to place an order for flowers to be delivered to the funeral home for the private service or to the family’s residence. Flowers are a beautiful way to show you care and bring a bit of hope to a challenging time. Another related idea is having a meal delivered to the family in the days following the death of their loved one, which can help alleviate stress and provide a bit of simple comfort. During the current pandemic, purchase food to be delivered rather than bringing a homecooked meal. Many restaurants have adopted creative methods to ensure safe practices and limit in-person contact.

Just be sure you make arrangements with the family in advance for any delivery option, especially so that proper safety guidelines can be maintained. Also, consider letting them know they don’t need to write you a thank-you. That way they can focus on themselves and their healing.

Make a Donation

Now more than ever, perhaps one of the most meaningful ways to honor someone who has passed is to make a donation in their name. You could make a contribution to COVID-19 response efforts, but you can also still opt for a personal route such as an organization related to the individual’s interests or a charity they supported. Send the family a message to let them know where you have donated to in memory of their loved one.

Visit the Gravesite

Gathering restrictions still apply at the burial site, but you could consider visiting the grave on your own. To be safe, refrain from touching the marker or any of the arrangements. Let the family know you were there. They will appreciate knowing that you were thinking of them and that you took the time to pay your respects to their loved one.

Follow Up Later

Write yourself a note or put a reminder in your phone to connect with those who are grieving again at a later date when the pandemic subsides or once the social distancing guidelines end. It will still be just as important to offer your support at that time.

The Death of a Pet

Thu, 20 Feb 2020 05:00:00 GMT

The Death of a Pet

Pets have a special way of providing happiness and comfort, and many people consider them beloved members of their family. If you are facing the loss of a pet, know that it is perfectly acceptable to grieve however you need to. It will likely take time to get used to life without your animal companion. Some people might not understand the value or depth of your relationship with your pet, but there are many, many pet owners who do. Seek out support from others who can relate.

Losing a pet can be especially challenging for children. They become accustomed to feeling unconditional love from what is often one of their closest friends, so the grief they experience is very real. It is important to be honest but also sensitive about the situation. Encourage them to talk about their feelings and give them plenty of time to heal before rushing to bring home a new pet. Reading a book about losing a pet will also help them understand what has happened and reassure them it is OK to be sad.

For children and adults alike, it can be helpful to have some sort of service or memorial, even if that means simply gathering the family together for a few minutes so that each person can choose a photo of the pet to frame. It encourages everyone to remember all of the good times spent with their pet and feel comfort in knowing those memories will always be held close to their hearts.

Memorialization Matters

Tue, 04 Feb 2020 05:00:00 GMT

Memorialization Matters

Similar to writing an obituary, memorializing a loved one does not mean simply signifying their death. It is an opportunity to recognize, honor, and remember their life. Besides paying tribute to a life lived, memorialization is also incredibly important for those grieving the loss of that life. It can help loved ones come to terms with the loss while also providing a source of peace as they journey through grief.

There is certainly no right or wrong way to memorialize a loved one. For some, memorialization comes as an experience, such as recreating favorite vacation memories shared with the one who passed or gathering with family to play their favorite sport. It could be through giving back to others by sponsoring an organization, facilitating an annual memorial charity event, or setting up a scholarship fund in a loved one’s name, for example.

A physical reminder of a loved one’s life helps offer comfort and hope when needed most. Making a pillow with one of their shirts, planting their favorite flowers, or framing one of their handwritten recipes are just a few of the possibilities. Some of the options for memorialization using cremated remains include jewelry, glass sculptures, and garden ornaments.

But permanent memorialization, which means creating a lasting memorial that will be kept intact for generations, has immense value. Family and friends can gather there to mourn the death and celebrate the life of the individual, now and for years to come. The most common forms of permanent memorials are traditional monuments and markers used in a cemetery. With more people opting for cremation, many cemeteries also feature cremation benches or columbaria.

No matter which options you choose, the most important thing is that you memorialize a loved one in some way. Call us or stop in today. We can explain more of the memorialization possibilities available and help you decide what is best for you and your family.

Common Cremation Questions

Mon, 06 Jan 2020 05:00:00 GMT

Common Cremation Questions

Can you still have a service if you choose cremation?

Yes, participating in a service or gathering is actually a vital part of the healing process. Direct cremation, without any type of service or memorialization, may extend the grief process. In no way does choosing cremation limit the possibilities for creating a meaningful, personalized tribute to honor, remember, and celebrate the life lived.

Is it possible to have a viewing when choosing cremation?

Yes, families can still have a public or private viewing prior to the cremation. Many people choose to have a visitation and funeral with the embalmed body present before it is cremated. Besides providing an opportunity for final goodbyes, a viewing helps loved ones recognize the reality of the death and begin their journey through grief.

What are some of the options for cremated remains?

The increasingly creative possibilities for cremated remains are nearly endless. Besides being placed in personalized urns, they can be incorporated into jewelry, set in a garden sculpture, or even suspended in glass. For a more traditional route, cremated remains can be buried in a cemetery, just as a casket would be, or placed in a columbarium there. If the family wishes to scatter the ashes, funeral professionals will often encourage apportionment, which means the cremated remains are divided, so that some can be used for a more permanent memorialization option. This gives loved ones an important physical marker of the individual’s life and legacy, now and for generations to come.

Is direct cremation the only option for those with financial constraints?

No, there is a wide variety of funeral service options for every budget. Funeral service professionals can help families create a meaningful, individualized tribute at a price they’re comfortable with, even when opting for cremation.

Grief and the Holidays

Sat, 14 Dec 2019 05:00:00 GMT

Funeral Etiquette Part 2: Common Questions

Thu, 24 Oct 2019 04:00:00 GMT

Funeral Etiquette Part 1: What to Expect

Thu, 17 Oct 2019 04:00:00 GMT

All About Ethical Wills

Wed, 25 Sep 2019 04:00:00 GMT

Three Motivating Factors for Preplanning Your Funeral

Mon, 19 Aug 2019 04:00:00 GMT

Three Motivating Factors for Preplanning Your Funeral

Talking about your own funeral might be an intimidating thought, but the reasons to meet with a funeral service professional in advance significantly outweigh any potential feelings of uncertainty. Here are three key points that will help give you encouragement to call for a preplanning appointment.

Your loved ones need your help. Arranging your funeral in advance enables you to consider your personal preferences and make your own unique choices, but it also eliminates the decision-making burden for your family. Preplanning is one of the best gifts you can give loved ones in order to ensure they will not be faced with such a heavy responsibility at an already emotionally overwhelming time. This allows them to focus on their journey through grief.

Death has no schedule. The best age to prearrange your funeral might be sooner than you think. Some funeral service experts say age fifty is a good time to get started; however, everyone would benefit from the immense value of having plans in place. In fact, it is a growing trend among young individuals who want to adequately prepare for their futures and for retirement, part of which includes putting final wishes in writing and proactively factoring in the financial aspects. Funeral homes can help you estimate costs and set aside funds in a funeral trust. This portable trust, which is not considered an asset, helps give you peace of mind that expenses will be covered when the time comes.

Preplanning meetings are not scary. A prearrangement conference involves a friendly conversation with a specialist who can guide you through the many options and help you properly record your wishes. The decisions made during preplanning can be altered at any time.

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Our funeral home has knowledgeable, experienced professionals who are eager to support you in the preplanning process. Call us to make an appointment today.

Grief Care: How Animals, Art, and Music Can Help

Mon, 15 Jul 2019 04:00:00 GMT

Grief Care: How Animals, Art, and Music Can Help

The overwhelming emotions that often accompany loss might leave you feeling helpless. Dr. Alan D. Wolfelt , highly respected author, educator, and grief counselor, says, “I sometimes call the necessary sadness of grief ‘sitting in your wound.’ When you sit in the wound of your grief, you surrender to it . . . You shut the world out for a time so that, eventually, you have created space to let the world back in.” It is important to seek support as needed when you experience the death of a loved one. Besides counselors and other medical professionals who have the knowledge and ability to assist grieving individuals, funeral home staff generally provide many ongoing grief support opportunities. But it can also be helpful to find additional, sensitive ways to confront the feelings of sadness and sorrow caused by loss. There are many complementary and alternative therapies that can be beneficial for those journeying through grief, and listed below are three common options.

Animal-Assisted Therapy

You may have seen a registered therapy dog wearing a vest at a school or hospital before, but they are now becoming a more frequent sight in funeral homes as well. Spending time with animals can actually help improve the moods of those struggling with anxiety, stress, depression, and even grief. Sometimes called pet therapy, animal-assisted activities are a casual, comforting way to bring calmness and joy to individuals who have recently experienced the loss of a loved one.

More information from the Animal Assisted Intervention International website: https://aai-int.org/what-we-do/

Art Therapy

A benefit of art therapy is that individuals can uncover and convey emotions through the process of creating. Art often provides a form of escape for people, which might help allow those who are grieving to feel a sense of peace, and it also encourages appreciation and enjoyment when life might otherwise feel overwhelming. While art therapy is a beneficial approach for anyone journeying through grief, it can be particularly useful for children and for those who have limited verbal communication ability.

More information from the American Art Therapy Association website: https://arttherapy.org/about-art-therapy/

Music Therapy

Music therapy can help individuals improve overall health and well-being in a variety of ways. A common myth is that only those with musical ability can take part in music therapy; however, no experience is necessary. Participants may be asked to do a variety of music-related activities, such as moving to the rhythm, writing lyrics, or practicing receptive listening, as part of a therapeutic intervention. Similar to art therapy, music therapy helps create an awareness of emotions and offers a way to express feelings, both of which are vital parts of the healing process for those who are grieving.

More information from the American Music Therapy Association website: https://www.musictherapy.org/about/musictherapy/

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If you are interested in one of these sources of grief support, talk to your doctor for more information and for a qualified therapist recommendation or program referral.

Grief Care: How Funeral Homes Provide Additional Support After The Service

Thu, 27 Jun 2019 04:00:00 GMT

Grief Care: How Funeral Homes Provide Additional Support After The Service

A simple cup of coffee, a kind phone call, a thoughtful card. The care a funeral home provides doesn’t end when the service and burial are complete. Anyone who has lost a loved one knows the journey through grief can seem overwhelming and lonesome, but funeral homes offer continued support along the way. Many funeral homes have a grief specialist or a grief care coordinator whose job it is to reach out to those who have recently experienced a loss and to provide them with compassionate care during the weeks, months, and years following. This ongoing support helps individuals manage grief in healthy ways. The opportunities to gather and talk create a sense of community at a time that might feel isolating. Listed below are just some of the ways funeral homes provide valuable grief support.

Support Groups

Most funeral homes offer meetings for those who are grieving, and some even have separate groups for children and teens or for those whose loved one died by suicide. Grief support groups generally meet on a regular basis and are led by the grief care coordinator. However, these gatherings are not limited to one particular style or structure; there are more casual options available, too. For example, some funeral homes host weekly knitting clubs or card games, and monthly lunches at restaurants are a common offering for widows.

Special Events

In addition to regular support group opportunities, grief care special events occur at different points throughout the year and are unique occasions for conversation, remembrance, and healing. These events can range from an informative seminar to a more lighthearted group painting session. A popular annual event hosted by many funeral homes is a holiday service of remembrance to honor those who have passed away each year. It is best to check funeral home websites or social media platforms for when and where these special events are offered.

Resources

Funeral homes provide many, many educational resources for those who have experienced loss. Most locations have shelves of useful books and brochures, as well as categorized lists of additional grief-related texts and movies. Grief care coordinators often send monthly newsletters or periodic emails. They can also direct individuals and families to many other organizations, events, and websites that are available to support those who are grieving.

Experience

Beyond hosting support groups, putting on events, and providing resources, funeral directors and grief specialists simply have more experience with death than most people. They are natural sources of guidance and encouragement, and, even after the funeral or memorial service is complete, they are still there to help. Contact your local funeral home for more information about the grief support they offer.

Funeral Flowers

Mon, 10 Jun 2019 04:00:00 GMT

Funeral Flowers

Flowers bring people joy, so it’s no surprise they are an integral part of many special occasions. We often think of poinsettias at Christmas, roses on Valentine’s Day, and lilies for Easter. It is common for weddings to feature stunning arrangements and for anniversaries to involve thoughtful bouquets. Funerals are no exception. Whether it is a lavish display of gladioli or a vase with a single yellow rose, flowers add beauty and sentiment to one of life’s most momentous events: death.

When someone I know passes away, should I send flowers to the funeral home or the family’s home?

Both are great options. Flowers delivered to the family’s home or place of work are often referred to as sympathy flowers and can be sent any time to show you are thinking of them. Those arrangements should be addressed to the family, and you might want to include a thoughtful condolence message.

Funeral flowers, sent directly to the funeral home, are very common displays at funeral and memorial services. Funeral homes make sending flowers to the service easy because most have an option to order arrangements through their website. All you have to do is choose and pay online. The system will automatically send your order to a local flower shop and have it delivered to the service.

If you plan to deliver flowers to the funeral home yourself, be sure to get them there with plenty of time before the visiting time or service begins. Also, keep in mind that funeral flower customs can vary based on religious beliefs and cultural norms, so you may need to take that into consideration.

No matter where you choose to send an arrangement, be sure to sign the card with your complete name(s) since the family may know many others with the same first or last name as you.

What if I would like to send an arrangement but the obituary says, “In lieu of flowers . . .”?

When the family includes a specific request for donations instead of flowers, it is best to respect their wishes. You could consider sending simple flowers along with a note saying you made a donation to the organization they listed.

What options are there for funeral flower arrangements?

There are casket sprays, standing sprays, baskets, wreaths, and other individual bouquet options.

How do I decide which flowers to send someone who is grieving?

Some find it heartwarming to send the type of flowers that the decedent most preferred. While any color of flower will be cherished, white and yellow are common choices. Many floral websites have a designated section for sympathy and funeral flowers to choose from, or you can simply ask the florist what they might suggest.

What should I do with the flowers after my loved one’s memorial service?

You get to decide what to do with a loved one’s funeral flower arrangements. Possible options include taking them home, leaving a few behind at a gravesite, giving some to family and friends, or donating them to places such as hospitals or nursing homes. You can also separate the arrangements into smaller groupings, and the opportunities for brightening others’ days with a beautiful bouquet are endless.

Also, before you decide what to do with the flowers, it might be worthwhile to take photographs of the arrangements to look back on.

Visiting Cemeteries

Thu, 23 May 2019 04:00:00 GMT

Visiting Cemeteries

Cemeteries have served as a transcendental site to mourn and honor the dead for hundreds of years, and, while seemingly centered around death, they have also always been an integral part of life. The history of cemeteries goes back to basic plots on family homesteads and small graveyards surrounding country churches. The need for more space led to the creation of larger cemeteries, generally on the outskirts of town. Traditionally, cemeteries were an essential and scenic part of every community, often featuring an elaborate entrance gate and stunning sculptures or greenery. Townspeople of the past even used cemeteries as a place to gather in good spirits and enjoy time outdoors.

In recent times, as more people recognize the importance of memorialization in the grieving process and as the desire for alternative burial options increases, cemeteries have evolved. Contemporary memorial parks emphasize the simplistic beauty of nature and of life by utilizing flat stones and including just a few tall monuments to represent hope. More modern options, such as a columbarium or a cremation bench, meet the needs of individuals who wish to be cremated. Some cemeteries have also aimed to better support those who are grieving by designing features like memorial walls, healing paths, and sacred spaces to gather or meditate.

Because burial signifies the finality of death, it can be a key part of the journey through grief for many individuals. Spending time at a gravesite encourages peace in knowing that a loved one is at rest. Besides paying tribute to a person’s life and legacy, permanent memorials can help sustain the feeling of a physical connection with the deceased. They also offer a place for others to remember and honor the decedent far into the future.

With Memorial Day approaching, there are a few etiquette reminders for upholding a respectful cemetery visit:

‍ Don’t

Stand or sit on a headstone or monument unless that is what it was designed for
Litter
Take photos of other people or of a burial occurring
Remove anything from someone else’s gravesite

‍ Do

Follow the posted rules
Keep pets on a leash and clean up after them
Be aware of your volume

If you are interested in learning more about cemeteries, burial options, or the connection between gravesites and grief, contact your local funeral home. The professionals there can also help assist you in designing a permanent memorial for you or a loved one.

Yoga For Grief And Sadness

Wed, 01 May 2019 04:00:00 GMT

Yoga For Grief And Sadness

Grief is not something you can plan for or rehearse. The grief process is different for everyone, and it follows no specific timeline. One of the biggest struggles for those journeying through grief is how to recover the normal they once had before losing their loved one. Although the effects of grief vary from person to person, stress is generally a common factor. It can disrupt daily life and lead to physical ailments such as headaches, irritability, and exhaustion.

Many people turn to mindful exercise for minimizing grief-related stress. Yoga is a great option to consider because it promotes serenity and introduces coping mechanisms for those who have just suffered a loss. Accumulating stressors caused by grief can physically manifest in a variety of ways, and some of them, such as holding your breath or clenching your teeth, might even go unnoticed. These seemingly minor symptoms can have a negative impact on the body. Whether you choose to join a class or purchase an instructional video, yoga helps relieve tension in a healthy way. The breathing exercises, movement, and meditation associated with yoga facilitate a sense of peace as you wade through grief.

In addition to developing healthy habits to help manage the stress of grief, it is important to seek additional support as needed. Funeral homes provide a safe space for families to both honor the life and mourn the death of loved ones, but they also offer many grief-related resources over the weeks and months following the funeral service. Grief care coordinators connect with and assist families who are working through the stress and emotions that accompany loss. Contact your local funeral professionals for more information about how to cope with the effects of grief. If you are interested in giving yoga a try, check out these great YouTube videos that were specifically developed for those who are grieving.

In “ Healing Yoga - Season 1 - Episode 12 – Grief ,” Deborah Devine encourages those who are grieving, regardless of age or fitness level, to use yoga as a way to manage the symptoms and encourage mindfulness.

In “ Yoga for grief and sadness // Yoga with Dionne // 20 minute practice ,” Dionne Elizabeth leads a gentle, calm series of yoga poses to create openness on the journey through grief.

Creative Ideas for Cremated Remains

Mon, 22 Apr 2019 04:00:00 GMT

Creative Ideas for Cremated Remains

Personalization is a significant part of funeral planning for many individuals, so deciding what to do with cremated remains can be another opportunity to creatively memorialize a loved one who has passed away. There are many options for those who prefer a more traditional route, but this list includes a few unique possibilities to consider.

Memory Glass: Memory Glass suspends cremated remains within solid glass sculptures or glass jewelry. This artistic option provides a personalized, beautiful reminder of your loved one’s legacy. www.memoryglass.com

Garden Memorials: Wind chimes, bird baths, and sundials are just a few of the outdoor memorialization options. Adding one of these features to your yard or garden makes it a special place to remember your loved one. www.batesville.com

Cremation Jewelry: This option involves inserting a small portion of a loved one’s cremated remains into a piece of jewelry, such as a pendant. Many people find cremation jewelry to be a comforting, constant reminder of their loved one. www.batesville.com

Biodegradable Urns or Tokens: There are many biodegradable urn and token options for ground burial or water scattering. These are creative, eco-friendly ways to memorialize and pay tribute to a loved one. www.batesville.com

If you are concerned about the cost of memorialization using cremated remains, there are many economy urns and keepsakes for customers with a low budget. Biodegradable construction, basic steel, particle board, and brass are some of the less expensive materials available. The possibilities seem almost endless for those interested in something completely extraordinary, too. Portions of cremated remains can be incorporated into artificial reef environments, fireworks, or even tattoo ink. The most important thing to remember is that every life is significant and should be memorialized in some way.

When deciding what to do with the cremated remains of a loved one, it might help to consider the future. Where would you want your loved one’s remains to be in five, fifteen, or even fifty years from now? Some individuals are electing to not have a funeral of any kind nor a memorial of their deceased family member. Unfortunately, this can extend the grief process. A physical marker of the life and legacy of a loved one who has passed helps family and friends heal. Funeral professionals always advise that a portion of the remains be retained for interment and memorialization in a cemetery or alternative location.

So, when it comes to deciding what to do with cremated remains, consider the wide range of possibilities as well as the potential impact of what you ultimately choose. Your local funeral home is ready and able to answer questions, explain the options available, and help you decide what is best for your family.

Swedish Death Cleaning And Peaceful Living

Mon, 01 Apr 2019 04:00:00 GMT

Swedish Death Cleaning And Peaceful Living

If you find yourself eager to organize closets and dust crevices, you might realize it’s that time of year again: spring cleaning. But if you can’t relate to that feeling, there are plenty of books out there to give you guidance and motivation.

Margareta Magnusson’s short text, The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning: How to Free Yourself and Your Family from a Lifetime of Clutter, offers one approach related to the popular values of minimalism and tidiness. The concept of death cleaning comes from the Swedish practice of sifting through possessions and determining what to do with them next, and Magnusson particularly emphasizes passing certain objects on to those who might enjoy them. This process is intentionally done to avoid burdening family or friends with such an overwhelming task after one passes away, although the method is equally beneficial in reducing excess belongings for any particular reason. While an orderly home is certainly a main focus, Magnusson also notes how the process can help one feel more comfortable with the idea of dying.

Swedish death cleaning, or any form of decluttering, might be worth considering if you are on the quest for more joy and less stress. Eliminating the frustration of mess and the burden of too much stuff might allow you to focus more on things like gratitude and living in the moment. Besides those organized closets and dusted crevices, spring cleaning might just lead you to a more peaceful life.

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Magnusson, Margareta. The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning: How to Free Yourself and Your Family from a Lifetime of Clutter . Scribbner, 2018.

Honoring A Loved One Who Has Passed

Wed, 13 Feb 2019 05:00:00 GMT

Honoring A Loved One Who Has Passed

While many people will be enjoying chocolate treats and dinner at a fancy restaurant this week, Valentine’s Day can also be a particularly challenging time for those who have lost a close loved one. Holidays can be aching reminders of how that special person is no longer here to celebrate with. If you have recently, or even not so recently, experienced the loss of someone near and dear, consider choosing one of these ways to honor their memory in a creative way.

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Start a New Tradition

One way to hold on to the presence of your loved one who has passed is to form a new tradition based on their interests. If your husband enjoyed hiking in the mountains as often as he could, start taking the kids to an indoor rock wall once a month for an entire year. If your best friend was a Halloween fanatic, plan an annual costume party in her honor for the neighborhood. If your grandmother was known for her caramel apple pie, vow to bake one each year on her birthday. Establishing this new ritual will provide you with a steady reminder that your loved one’s spirit lives on, and it will give you something to look forward to when needed most.

Try Something Artistic

Create a simple poem, serious or humorous, about a loved one who has passed by using words and phrases cut out from a magazine. Invite guests over and cook them your loved one’s favorite meal. Get together with family to paint your loved one’s favorite saying or Bible verse on a canvas to hang in your house.

Appreciate Life

While grieving the death of a loved one can cause deep sorrow, it is so important to be reminded of life during this difficult time. Ask a friend to join you on an exciting adventure such as going zip lining or taking a weekend road trip. Visit someone you know who recently had a baby. Start a gratitude journal. Plant a garden. Treat yourself to something you’ve always wanted or simply schedule some time for extra self-care.

Give Back

Lastly, what better way to honor the life of a loved one than to do something generous and caring on their behalf. Random Acts of Kindness Day, which falls on February 17, is a perfect opportunity to share the overflowing love you still have for a friend or family member who has passed away.

Do You Know These Funeral Service Terms?

Thu, 07 Feb 2019 05:00:00 GMT

Do You Know These Funeral Service Terms?

When it comes to planning a funeral, there are certain words and phrases that many people are unsure of, and the language can be confusing even to those who have been through it before. This glossary of terms will hopefully give you a better understanding of funeral service and its many options!

Advance Planning, Pre-Planning or Pre-Need Planning

The act of arranging for final disposition, including a funeral, cremation, memorial, ceremony or other service/plans prior to death. This can involve simply recording one's wishes and/or making financial arrangements.

Aftercare or Grief Care

Terms used to refer to the various services that are available from a funeral home or crematory following the death of a loved one.

Alkaline hydrolysis, Bio-Cremation, Resomation, Flameless or Water Cremation

A process for the disposal of human remains using lye and heat. The process is being touted as an alternative to the traditional options of burial or cremation.

Alternative Container

A container made of unfinished wood, fiberboard, pressed wood, or composition materials, which lacks fine finish or ornamentation. Often chosen for cremation due to their combustible nature, alternative containers may also be used for direct burials or green burials.

Apportionment

When cremated remains are divided for separate disposition (separating some cremated remains in an urn to be scattered or dividing smaller portions into keepsake urns).

Arrangement Conference

A meeting between the funeral director and the family or representative of the deceased for the purpose of planning a funeral or final disposition of a deceased person.

Bereaved

Someone who is suffering the death of a loved one; this could be immediate family or friends.

Bier, Church Truck or Catafalque

The stand on which the casket rests during a ceremony or viewing. The Church Truck is a collapsible version of this stand.

Burial Permit

A legal document used to authorize burial, cremation, scattering or disinterment. The funeral director usually obtains the burial permit on behalf of the family.

Columbarium

A structure that is used to house urns with the cremated remains of the deceased. It may be either freestanding, or part of a chapel or mausoleum.

Committal Service or Graveside Service

The portion of a ceremony that may involve speaking last words just prior to burial or the placement of cremated remains.

Cosmetize

To prepare the deceased body for viewing or visitation by using cosmetic products.

Cremation

A method used to reduce the body of a deceased human or animal down to its basic elements. The most common method of cremation involves incineration at high temperatures.

Cremation Jewelry, Memorial Jewelry or Keepsake Jewelry

A special type of memorial jewelry which may include a small amount of the cremated remains or several strands of hair of the deceased, or dried floral particles from the funeral of the deceased. Keepsake jewelry can also be created by using a fingerprint or DNA of the deceased.

Crematory or Crematorium

The facility where cremation of a human or animal body takes place.

Death Benefits

The benefits available to the survivors of the deceased, such as Social Security benefits and/or Veterans Benefits. This is determined by eligibility.

Death Certificate

The legal document that certifies the death of the deceased. This is required by law after a person dies and must be completed by two parties -- a medical professional (either a physician, coroner, or medical examiner), who will certify the death by noting the cause of death, time of death and the identity of the deceased, and a licensed funeral director, who will confirm that the body was properly handled and that final disposition occurred.

Direct Burial or Immediate Burial

A simple burial with no viewing or visitation, usually involving only the transportation, care, and burial of the remains.

Direct Cremation or Immediate Cremation

A simple cremation with no ceremony, viewing or visitation, usually involving only the transportation, care and cremation of the remains.

Disposition

The placement of whole remains in their final resting place or the completion of the cremation process. Burial is a form of disposition, as is cremation.

Embalming

The process of temporarily preserving a body by using chemical injections and/or topical applications to maintain a static condition through the time required for viewing and funeral ceremonies.

Eulogy

A speech delivered at a funeral or memorial service in honor of the deceased. The person delivering the eulogy is usually a close friend, member of the clergy, family member or other person of significance to the deceased.

Funeral, Memorial Service or Celebration of Life

A ceremony that honors, celebrates, and remembers the life of a person who has died.

Funeral Director, Mortician or Undertaker

At a funeral home, the staff member who works with a family to arrange burial, cremation or other funeral services. A funeral director is generally licensed through state health departments, although not every state requires licensure.

Funeral Escort

Law enforcement or other contracted individuals who escort a funeral procession to the cemetery.

Funeral Procession

After the funeral service is finished, the remains of the deceased are transported to the final resting place as part of a funeral procession made up of two or more vehicles.

General Price List

The General Price List (GPL) is a written, itemized price list that every funeral home is required by Federal Trade Commission law to provide to consumers upon request or at any time in which a price discussion occurs. It lists all the items and services that the funeral home offers, along with the cost of each item or service.

Green Funeral or Natural Funeral (aka Green Burial or Natural Burial)

A funeral designed around concepts, practices, and options that are considered eco-friendly. For example, the use of bio-degradable materials for burial containers, embalming, etc.

Hearse or Casket Coach

A vehicle designed to transport the deceased as part of the funeral ceremony and/or procession.

Interment

The act of placing a body in a grave or tomb.

Inurnment

The act of placing cremated remains in an urn and/or columbarium.

Irrevocable Contract

An irrevocable contract must be used solely for the purpose of paying for funeral expenses. Most people choose to make their pre-funded funeral dollars irrevocable because they want to ensure that the money will be available to pay for their funeral at the time of their death.

Mausoleum

A building that is used to house the casketed remains of a person above ground, instead of burial in a grave.

Next of Kin

The deceased person's closest living relative.

Niche

The space in a mausoleum or columbarium which holds the remains or cremated ashes of the deceased.

Obituary

A written notice placed in newspapers, online, etc. which announces a person's death. The obituary may contain biographical information about the deceased, surviving relatives, funeral arrangements, and other information requested by the family.

Officiant or Celebrant

The person who leads the funeral or memorial service.

Outer Burial Container

Also known as a "vault" or "grave liner," this is a structure made of concrete, metal, or wood that supports the casket in the ground and helps to keep the grave from collapsing.

Pall Bearer, Casket Bearer or Urn Bearer

A person who helps to carry or escort the casket or urn during a funeral or memorial service.

Plot

A specific piece of ground that is owned by a family or an individual and located in a cemetery. It is used to bury the casketed body or urn containing cremated remains.

Revocable Contract

A revocable funeral contract can be cancelled at any time, and the released funds can be used for any purpose.

Scattering

The act of distributing the cremated remains of the deceased.

Scattering Garden

A specific area or plot of land set aside for scattering the cremated remains of humans or pets. The scattering garden is usually owned by a cemetery or crematory. Permission to scatter must be obtained and recorded with the cemetery or crematory staff.

Urn

A container designed to hold the cremated remains or ashes of the deceased, either on a temporary or permanent basis.

Urn Vault

A small reinforced container used to house a cremation urn that is buried in the ground.

Viewing or Visitation

The viewing or visitation offers relatives and friends of the deceased an opportunity to view the deceased or the closed casket or urn before the funeral or memorial ceremony.

Vigil or Prayer Service

A vigil refers specifically to a Roman Catholic religious service held on the eve of the funeral. A prayer service refers to the similar type of religious service without the Roman Catholic tenets.

Wake

A watch kept over the deceased, held the night before the funeral and sometimes lasting the entire night.

What To Say In A Sympathy Card

Wed, 09 Jan 2019 05:00:00 GMT

What To Say In A Sympathy Card

When someone you know experiences the loss of a loved one, it can leave you without words. At the same time, you want to extend condolences, so you carefully select a beautiful sympathy card to send. When you sit down to sign it, you might worry about saying the wrong thing or start to think nothing you say will matter. It can certainly be a frustrating situation for you at a time when you would rather put your energy toward those who are grieving.

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However, the most important thing is that you say something. We know that grief requires support, and writing a heartfelt message in a sympathy card is a simple way to show you care. If you are stuck and in search of a little guidance, this list offers a few basic options. You can use these suggestions as they are or edit them for a more personal touch.

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To put it bluntly, the journey through grief is awful. It feels good to have others validate this fact and acknowledge your pain—in a real and gritty way.

• Our thoughts and prayers are with you during this impossibly difficult time.

• There are no answers or actions that can remove your heartache, but please know you are not alone. We are thinking of you during this sad time.

• You can cry with me any time.

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Honestly acknowledging that you do not know what to say is completely acceptable, and a genuine approach is often greatly appreciated.

• During times of loss, we realize how limiting words can be. Just know that we are thinking of you.

• Words cannot do justice to the heartache you and your family are experiencing. We are so very sorry for your loss and are thinking of you during this sad time.

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Knowing the positive impact a loved one has had on others can be therapeutic for those left behind.

• Although she will be greatly missed, I know her spirit will continue to shine through those whose lives she has touched.

• The world is a better place because of your mom’s generosity and kind heart. Her legacy lives on.

• Your father was such a wise, caring, and humble person. It was a privilege to have known him.

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It sounds so simple, but it is comforting for the family just to know others care about their loss. Often times, a handful of direct, sincere words can be more effective than going overboard with commiseration.

• Our thoughts are with you.

• Please extend my sympathy to your family and know that we are sending love your way.

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While what you choose to write in a sympathy card might largely depend on the relationship you have with the person you are sending it to, there are a few things you should always avoid saying. Messages that compare sorrow or force the recipient on a specific timeline for healing are unhelpful because everyone will grieve in their own way. Even if you have the best of intentions, it is also not the right time to give advice. Humbly offering genuine words of support, no matter which ones you end up choosing, will show you care, and that is, after all, why you bought the sympathy card in the first place.